This Can't be real life.

This can't be real. Just TWO years ago Prince had a father. He wore masks almost every time he went out and he didn't go to school parties...He was innocent and he didn't even know that Niki existed. I SERIOUSLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE THIS. Even weed doesn't make me forget. Yeah, it takes me away from lot's of things and I really don't have too many Prince-related negative thoughts when I'm under the influence but the only way I'm going to get away from THIS is to SLEEP. My mind has to literally GO SOMEWHERE ELSE to escape the emotions I get when I think of Prince and Niki together.... I want to crawl under the nearest rock and literally shrivel up and DIE. Right now I don't want ANYONE but Prince. And I hate when I feel this way because it's not like I even wish to be in a relationship with him. I just want to be his friend...I want him to love me. If I died right now I'd want him to CARE.

It would be amazing if he fell in love with me though.

My life would be complete.

But if that's not possible....

I just wish something obtainable comes along that makes me as happy as he does. I think I do deserve to be happy. I'm not THAT bad of a person.