Right now, I'm watching this movie called Fried Green Tomatoes! It sounds wack but it's an AMAZING movie and I love it alot! I just watched re-watched the beginning for the 2nd time tonight because I missed most of it while writing the last post :P I know I'm still, writing, but I'm paying more attention this time lol.
Anyways,
Idgie, one of the main characters becomes pretty much best friends with her late brother's girl friend. I mean, they were the best of friends! The age difference stood out to me because from the looks of it, it looks like the age difference between Blanket and I :)
In the beginning Idgie is about 9 and Ruth is about 16 when Buddy (Idgie's brother dies).
And even though the two girls don't become great friends until they're a little bit older, it still happens.
I bet Blanket and I could be great friends!! I fantasize about it all the time<3 Him and I at the park, me taking pictures of him being silly in the beautiful sunlight, just giggling up a storm :) It could happen...
Speaking of the little munchkin, he's official 9 years old today<33 I hope he had a fabulous time at his party yesterday <33
Monday, February 21, 2011
J'adore, Michaela Blankets
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| Isaac Blankets* , aka little MJ. He was even featured in Michael's latest video<3 |
Unfortunately for her, I don't think Prince finds her attractive. He claims that she follows him around (which she probably does, cause I would) and he says he finds it annoying.
But Michaela is a cool girl.
She even stayed the night at Hayvenhurst with Paris :) Plus, her brother had a playdate with Blanket!...
Please don't ask me how I know all of this because it will only take away from the point that I'm trying to make...
Michaela is doing exactly what I would be doing if I were in her shoes. She's living the life that I'd love to have, and she even reminds me a bit of myself. I love that girl for that! I wish that we could be friends, and maybe someday we will be!
Paris sure would benefit more from hanging out with Michaela than she's getting with Emma Duff*, probably learning how to kiss guys and take nude pics or something...smh!
Michael, please watch over your daughter. I'm afraid she might be going down the wrong path... :(
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| Michaela Blankets* , she's so beautiful! No homo! |
*Last names changed for privacy reasons.
It's Not as Bad as It Looks
I've been through a lot of things in my 16 years of living. Including the death of 2 fathers AND a father-like figure (MJ), a Mother with a life threatening disease, being teased, low self esteem, being expelled for a minor infraction, being arrested for drug possession, changing schools over 5 times, moving over and over, and the list goes on and on........
BUT
Right now, things aren't as bad as they could be. The only real issue I have now is that I'm not in school which leaves me at home, ALONE, with my thoughts, and obsessions, all day. That's never good for someone with such a great mind like me. It often makes me feel like I'm going crazy. Being alone, with nothing to do all day also gives me TOO MUCH TIME to cyberstalk the people I wish I could be with. This is what makes me think that they have become my WORLD.
Hopefully, my life will take a turn for the better next fall when I go back to school for the...what...3rd time? lol But I'm not bitching out this time. It's not worth it, man. It's just not worth it.
There's so much life out there and I hate missing out on it.
BUT
Right now, things aren't as bad as they could be. The only real issue I have now is that I'm not in school which leaves me at home, ALONE, with my thoughts, and obsessions, all day. That's never good for someone with such a great mind like me. It often makes me feel like I'm going crazy. Being alone, with nothing to do all day also gives me TOO MUCH TIME to cyberstalk the people I wish I could be with. This is what makes me think that they have become my WORLD.
Hopefully, my life will take a turn for the better next fall when I go back to school for the...what...3rd time? lol But I'm not bitching out this time. It's not worth it, man. It's just not worth it.
There's so much life out there and I hate missing out on it.
I'm Back
Sorry for being M.I.A for the past few weeks. In all honestly, I was planning on deleting this blog. I actually came here today for that purpose...but then I read my old posts and I knew I couldn't let them go to waste. Something in my soul tells me that once I'm past this depressed stage in my life, someone just like me is going to experience it as well, and my words could definatley help them out, even if it's just to make them feel like they're not the only one going through this.
Lately, I've been doing...fair....
Smoking A LOT of weed, but I'm not saying that as a bad thing. Of course, I hate feeling like I'm dependent on it, I hate knowing my it disappoints my Mom, and I hate knowing that even though it's just a plant, it's ILLEGAL (which is breaking the laws of the land). But....it's not as bad as heroin. Hell, it's not even as bad as alcohol in my opinion.
I read a Dave Chappelle quote on Tumblr the other day that made so much sense! It was about how weed brings people together! And you're right! Especially with the youth of today. Alcohol doesn't do that.
Lately, I've been doing...fair....
Smoking A LOT of weed, but I'm not saying that as a bad thing. Of course, I hate feeling like I'm dependent on it, I hate knowing my it disappoints my Mom, and I hate knowing that even though it's just a plant, it's ILLEGAL (which is breaking the laws of the land). But....it's not as bad as heroin. Hell, it's not even as bad as alcohol in my opinion.
I read a Dave Chappelle quote on Tumblr the other day that made so much sense! It was about how weed brings people together! And you're right! Especially with the youth of today. Alcohol doesn't do that.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
-Getting Closer 2 Rock Bottom-
I'm beginning to see more and more how serious things are getting between Niki and Prince....I just want to explode. I'm full of A LOT of emotions. I'm not sure which one to explain. I don't know what to do.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Outsider.
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| Photo Actually Taken on Dec. 25, 2010 |
Today I felt extremely used. I'm also very awkward. Today I was humiliated. I'm not sure if I'm blowing things up in my mind or being treated really badly.
I know i'll never be anything like them, and honestly, I'd rather die than be like them.
But no ones wants to feel like and outsider.
Like a black swan.
But I guess I'll continue to be used...
at least until I get things rolling for myself.
Then no ones going to be able to tell me anything!!!
Understanding Obsessions
There’s not enough information out there about obsessions. Not just regular OCD obsessions, but obsessions with actual people. Most of the time when you hear about someone being obsessed with another person, you automatically think they’re a complete and total creep or stalker. You see them as a possible pervert or threat to the person in which they are fascinated by. No one ever tries to figure out what made the obsessor so fascinated by their obsession.
And I think it’s quite unfair.
I think people need to understand that for some people. We’re not looking to hurt the objects of our affections at all. In fact, we only want to make sure they’re okay. We want to meet them, and befriend them, and have them in our lives.
Perhaps you’ve never met a certain person, but you know of them. They’re well known so you see a fair amount of pictures and or videos of them. You’re intrigued. All you want now is to see more and more of them and know more and more about them to the point where they’re consuming your thoughts and you don’t know why you feel this way.
Does that make you crazy?
Maybe. But you still have your sanity. You still know how to read and write. You still know how to socialize and go about your daily routines, but in your mind and you’re heart you still can’t shake thoughts of them. You’re not thinking perverted or malice at all. You just day dream about being with the person and listening to them talk, hearing them laugh or even something as simple as passing them in crowded hallway and your eyes meet.
What do people categorize the obsessed person as? Mentally unstable?
People might think the person is making too big a deal of out the situation. People think it’s simple to just NOT think about something that weighs so heavily on your heart. People think it’s easy to just WALK AWAY and stop yourself from becoming obsessive….but it’s not.
Overtime your obsession becomes your drug.
You’re planning your entire life around someday getting to meet your obsession. It literally brings you to tears knowing they could possibly be somewhere having fun and living life WITHOUT YOU.
And on top of that, you don’t understand why you feel this way! The feelings are foreign and you’d do anything to make them stop and go away, but you don’t know how! You don’t know who to turn to because NO ONE understands.
What do you do?
Before I die I want to play a role in helping the world understand things like this. There needs to be more information on it. There needs to be more people coming together and helping each other beat their obsessions before they ruin our lives.
Cause if you’re obsessed with 3 siblings who live 10000000000 miles away from you and there’s a chance that you’ll never ever meet in your lifetimes, then you HAVE to get over it eventually. Or you’ll life will be HELL.
And I think it’s quite unfair.
I think people need to understand that for some people. We’re not looking to hurt the objects of our affections at all. In fact, we only want to make sure they’re okay. We want to meet them, and befriend them, and have them in our lives.
Perhaps you’ve never met a certain person, but you know of them. They’re well known so you see a fair amount of pictures and or videos of them. You’re intrigued. All you want now is to see more and more of them and know more and more about them to the point where they’re consuming your thoughts and you don’t know why you feel this way.
Does that make you crazy?
Maybe. But you still have your sanity. You still know how to read and write. You still know how to socialize and go about your daily routines, but in your mind and you’re heart you still can’t shake thoughts of them. You’re not thinking perverted or malice at all. You just day dream about being with the person and listening to them talk, hearing them laugh or even something as simple as passing them in crowded hallway and your eyes meet.
What do people categorize the obsessed person as? Mentally unstable?
People might think the person is making too big a deal of out the situation. People think it’s simple to just NOT think about something that weighs so heavily on your heart. People think it’s easy to just WALK AWAY and stop yourself from becoming obsessive….but it’s not.
Overtime your obsession becomes your drug.
You’re planning your entire life around someday getting to meet your obsession. It literally brings you to tears knowing they could possibly be somewhere having fun and living life WITHOUT YOU.
And on top of that, you don’t understand why you feel this way! The feelings are foreign and you’d do anything to make them stop and go away, but you don’t know how! You don’t know who to turn to because NO ONE understands.
What do you do?
Before I die I want to play a role in helping the world understand things like this. There needs to be more information on it. There needs to be more people coming together and helping each other beat their obsessions before they ruin our lives.
Cause if you’re obsessed with 3 siblings who live 10000000000 miles away from you and there’s a chance that you’ll never ever meet in your lifetimes, then you HAVE to get over it eventually. Or you’ll life will be HELL.
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